Monday, August 13, 2007

Qustions and Answers in court

These are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now published by court reporters - who had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were taking place. Some of these are excellent - don't miss the last one.

Q : What is your date of birth?

A : July fifteenth.

Q : What year?

A : Every year.

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Q : What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?

A : Gucci sweats and Reeboks

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Q : This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?

A : Yes

Q : And in what ways does it affect your memory?

A : I forget.

Q : You forget. Can you give us an example of something that you've forgotten?

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Q : How old is your son, the one living with you?

A : Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which.

Q : How long has he lived with you?

A : Forty-five years.

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Q : What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke up that morning?

A : He said, "Cathy, Where am I?"

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Q : And why did it upset you?

A : My name is Susan.

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Q : Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?

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Q : The youngest son, the twenty-year old, how old is he?

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Q : Were you present at the time your picture was taken?

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Q : So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?

A : Yes

Q : And what were you doing at that time?

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Q : She had three children, right?

A : Yes.

Q : How many were boys?

A : None.

Q : Were there any girls?

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Q : How was your first marriage terminated?

A : By death.

Q : And by whose death was it terminated?

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Q : Can you described the individual?

A : He was about medium height and had a beard.

Q : Was this a male, or a female?

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Q : Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?

A : No, this is how I always dress when I go to work.

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Q : Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?

A : All my autopsies are performed on dead people.

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Q : All your responses must be oral, OK?

What school did you go to?

A : Oral.

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Q : Do you recall the time that you examined the body?

A : The autopsy started around 8.30 p.m.

Q : And Mr Dennington was dead at the time?

A : No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy on him.

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Q : Are you qualified to give a urine sample?

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Q : Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?

A : No

Q : Did your check for blood pressure?

A : No

Q : Did your check for breathing?

A : No

Q : So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?

A : No

Q : How can you be so sure, Doctor?

A : Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.

Q : But could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?

A : Not unless he was out practicing law somewhere.

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